TCU NIL Deals: 10 Player Endorsements We Want to See

What’s in a name? Maybe millions. Boardroom plays matchmaker to find the perfect brand partner for 10 TCU NIL athletes hoping to become the next Kool-Aid McKinstry.

What’s the best way to arrest the attention of a brand perusing the celebrity endorsement market? A series of deeply conceptual, Twyla Tharp-choreographed TikTok dances probably doesn’t hurt, but if you’re already directly associated with a brand name synonymous with decades of success, you’ve got a priceless advantage in your favor.

When pondering this with regards to college football, you might not mention the Texas Christian University Horned Frogs first. But that’s precisely what makes the market for TCU NIL deals a legitimately booming one.

Aided by the Fort Worth-based third-party TCU NIL collective known as Think NIL, a football season reaches its apex at the College Football Playoff with a veritable athletics-industrial complex behind it. But of all the brand deals Purple and White athletes are signing in the name, image, and likeness era, we haven’t yet seen one that rises to the level of Alabama cornerback Ga’Quincy “Kool-Aid” McKinstry’s deal with Kool-Aid or Nebraska receiver Decoldest Crawford’s pact with an air conditioning company. These two guys are the top candidates for the title of most perfectly literal, sensical endorsement of all time.

That got us thinking — who else on Sonny Dykes’ Horned Frogs roster could earn big-time dollars by leveraging something as fundamental as their name alone? It’s time for Boardroom to play matchmaker and propose 10 TCU NIL deals that actually make too much sense not to consummate post-haste.

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TCU Football NIL Deals We Want to See

LB Terrence Cooks Jr. + HelloFresh

• Class: Redshirt freshman
• Hometown: Pearland, Texas
• Why we chose HelloFresh: Because Blue Apron f—ing skimped on fingerling potatoes for the last time
• Other brand(s) we recommend: Drake feat. 21 Savage

Dee Winters + The North Face

• Class: Senior
• Hometown: Brenham, Texas
• Why we chose The North Face: It is a cold, cold world in which we live
• Other brand(s) we recommend: Allstate

WR Taye Barber + Sport Clips

• Class: Senior
• Hometown: Cypress, Texas
• Why we chose Sport Clips: The company was founded in Texas, and our latest intel suggests that Taye Barber has hair
• Other brand(s) we recommend: Sweeney Todd

Luke Pardee + Andrew W.K.

• Class: Sophomore
• Hometown: Houston, Texas
• Why we chose Andrew W.K.: I thought it was self-explanatory
• Other brand(s) we recommend: Smirnoff Ice

QB Sam Jackson + BMF Wallets

• Class: Redshirt freshman
• Hometown: Naperville, Illinois
• Why we chose BMF Wallets: Ezekiel 25:17
• Other brand(s) we recommend: SHAFT Animation Studio

RB Brant Ahlfinger + Isotoner gloves

• Class: Freshman
• Hometown: Fort Worth, Texas
• Why we chose Isotoner: The plush microluxe lining is like a Hollywood red carpet for hands, but with far less Pauly Shore, probably
• Other brand(s) we recommend: The NYC Health Center for Hand Surgery

P Jordy Sandy + Tommy Bahama beach umbrellas

• Class: Senior
• Hometown: Traralgon, Australia
• Why we chose Tommy Bahama: Because of that magical weekend back in the day after the Midnight Oil concert by the boardwalk
• Other brand(s) we recommend: Asbury Park Historical Society

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LB Jake Boozer + National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism

• Class: Redshirt freshman
• Hometown: Waco, Texas
• Why we chose the NIAAA: Jake will be the coolest guy at any college party
• Other brand(s) we recommend: Kelly’s shoe polish

TE Austin Scheets + Brooklinen

• Class: Redshirt freshman
• Hometown: Colleyville, Texas
• Why we chose Brooklinen: Have you FELT this percale?!?
• Other brand(s) we recommend: Microsoft Excel

WR Christopher Chosen + B’nai B’rith

• Class: Sophomore
• Hometown: Houston, Texas
• Why we chose B’nai B’rith: AIPAC was too busy with the whole [REDACTED]
• Other brand(s) we recommend: Tyron Woodley

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